You never know how people feel about themselves especially if they are good at hiding their insecurities.
As for me, I never knew the beauty that others saw when looking at me until I was 34 years old. It was my friend and former co-worker who told me that I was beautiful. He made me realize that the hell I was living in with my first ex-husband was not normal. He told me that my ex-husband should not be talking to me that way. I thought the way that I was living was normal because I endured the taunting, name calling, and verbal abuse for so many years. For years, I suffered in silence until the abuse became physical on September 9, 2001. That night, I thought that I would die from the beating of the belt and the punch in the face that knocked me onto the kitchen floor after falling over a chair.
With my remaining strength, I got up and ran into the home office to reach the phone to call the police. While running, he was chasing and threatening me with demonic red eyes and raspy voice from hell saying, “If you call the police, I will kill you.” Thank God, I made it to the fax machine phone and reached the police. The policeman told me to stay on the phone asking if my ex had a gun. I replied, “No.” Then, the policeman stated, “We are on the way.”
No one knew the hell I endured for more than 19.5 years with my ex-husband. Thank God I am healed to tell the story to help others. Now, I know that I am beautiful and deserve the best.
paintopurpose 